Asking for help... the other side

I meet many people in both my personal and professional life- and have been guilty of this myself- who have difficulty asking for help. Perhaps it is because they are afraid to bother people. Perhaps it's because they don't know what they want. And perhaps it is because they feel like nobody wants to help them. I would like to put you in the shoes of the other person- the one who is likely sitting there waiting to be asked for help- and hope this can be a useful perspective the next time you find yourself in need.
1) When you don't ask for what you need, you are putting the other person in the position of being a mind-reader. This can be frustrating all around. I have worked with couples in therapy that use a lot of energy wishing that their partner would "just know" what they need. Or that they should know, because their partner knows them better than anyone else, right? This is not fair or realistic. We are not mind-readers (and that works both ways!) so you can save a lot of hurt or resentful feelings by not assuming anything and just being direct.
2) The other person genuinely (usually) really wants to help. How many times, after something tragic happens, do people come up and say, "If you need something, please let me know". Ideally, the person offering could just do something, but more often than not, people just don't know what to do. But they really do want to help, and they really not know what you want or need. Sometimes you really don't want another casserole, or more phone calls, but would really love [insert want/need here]. Take people up on their offers. You are not being a bother.
3) Speaking of directness, I will just say it: sometimes it can just be downright annoying when a person continually refuses to assert their needs. You know the person- the one who complains, and then turns down offers of help or support? And then you hear second (or third) hand that the person is still really in need of your help. This really stirs up a yucky pot of mixed emotions, assumptions and misinformation. If someone offers help, and you really could use help, accept the offer.

I genuinely believe that for the most part, people are good and live by the Golden Rule. If somebody offers help, take it! If you need it, it is OK to ask for it- it doesn't make you a bad person- it makes you human.